I posted the following a couple of weeks ago on Facebook. Since then, I have had several people suggest I share my journey through a blog or other form of social media. I’m not sure how I feel about it, but I do want to document it for me…so I might as well share. Its a little strange using this forum, as this blog has been a place where I have shared recipes, a LOT of recipes, over the years. But I am comfortable here. Hopefully, this works….
So… I am the queen of doing things the hard way. Kind of irritated with myself right now. I have 3 relatively major medical things going on right now…2 of which could have been avoided if I would have controlled my weight.
Confession time… I have weighed over 300 pounds for over 20 years… a couple of years ago I got down to 285 but have regained all I lost. I know I had a family history of diabetes and I know that I have a genetic factor for blood clots. I know that losing weight and exercising regularly helps with both of them.
This summer, I have gotten the 2×4 to the back of the head wake-up call. And its time to get real. I have diabetes which I CAN control with diet and losing weight. I am going to have to deal with the faulty veins in my legs… compression socks and exercise and weightloss were today’s prescription. And I will be having a hysterectomy in May…and I need to lose 50+ pounds in order to make the surgery less complicated.
The doctor today suggested bariatric surgery but I’d really rather not. I don’t want to be on meds and I don’t want surgery unless I have no other choice. I still have a choice for now.
Why am I sharing this on Facebook? Because it motivates me… And because there are several of you who need to know all this anyway. And because I am going to need a lot more support than I ever have before because I HAVE to do this. It is no longer optional.
Thank you FB family for letting me vent. I’m not depressed or angry…just feeling the need to get serious about something I should have taken serious long ago.
This has been an interesting last few months. A lot of very positive changes in both my personal life and in my professional life. After several years of recovering and trying to decide which direction I should go, I think I have found the right path 🙂
The biggest change in my life is finding love. I had pretty much decided that I wasn’t going to do the relationship thing again. I met Len at the start of Christmas break and it was like coming home. It is definitely an ongoing adventure but I feel like I have found someone I can spend the rest of my life with.
Another big change happened at work. After 15 years of teaching elementary and middle school English and reading, I made the change to middle and high school Social Studies. I got my secondary license and taught 7th and 9th grade New Mexico history this spring. This fall, I will add AP Government. My BA was in history and political science, so this is an exciting change!
As an extension to the NM History, I created a new blog. I travel around the state a lot and take pictures. So I thought I should set up a place to share all things New Mexico. You can check it out at New Mexico~Home, History, Life.
Finally, I am continuing to write. My second novel is about half done. AND… I have a short story coming out in an anthology in September. I will keep you all posted on that!
Absolutely loving my life right now!
Look to the east
It’s the dawn of a new day
All brand new and shiny and full of promise
Reflecting warmth and color
Bringing daydreams to life
Rays of sunlight
Reaching for Earth
Christening the morn with hope and happiness
For one heart-stopping moment
All possibility seems tangible
As sunlight dances with clouds
Then the sun peeks over the horizon
Stores her beauty for another morning
While radiantly warming our world.
I’ve spent a lot of my life afraid…afraid of everything. Afraid of life.
A lot of that life hiding in books and daydreams.
And looking for love and acceptance
Or maybe looking for me.
Somewhere along the way I disappeared
I hid my true self and adopted the self others thought were best
Pretending to be what they wanted
And ignoring the little voice crying in my mind.
I’ve been slowly chipping away at those layers
Layers of other personalities
of other people’s versions of me
And like a chick breaking out of its shell
Stretching for freedom
I have found me.
And I refuse to hide again for anyone.
My plans for 2017 are basically to continue the path I started in 2016
Continue to work on my health, losing weight and getting stronger
Hiking…I hope to hike the Pino Trail to the top of Sandia and possibly La Luz as well
Road trips around New Mexico to see some of what I’ve not seen. In particular, Carlsbad Caverns, White Sands, Bandalier
Possibly some out-of-state travel… out-of-the-country would be cool
Finish the novel I’m working on and get some of my writing published
Make time for some of my other hobbies
Happy New Years!!!!
The stuff of dreams
High above, getting a bird’s eye view
Running rather than standing ground
Hiding not fighting
Instead of fear
Daydreams turning to reality
Sparkling and new
So many choices